By Erin Voss
Contrary to some of my ex's beliefs, spit is not lube. There’s a lotta lube out there - and just as much misinformation about it - so the options can feel overwhelming. Which can I use with condoms? Will this one damage my toys? What's the deal with flavored lube??
Read on to make choosing a lube smooth, slippery sailing!
[TLDR below]
Why use lube?
Personal lubricants, aka lubes, provide a slippery barrier between your genitals and whatever is going on or in them, which is important for delicate vulvovaginal or anorectal tissue. In addition to generally making solo and partnered sex play feel better for everyone, lube is a key ingredient in safer sex - it reduces friction and, thus, the chance of condoms breaking or skin tearing (ouch!).
So, let’s get some clarity on the different types of lube: water-based, silicone-based, hybrid, and oil-based.
Water-based
Water-based lubes are safe to use with all types of condoms and sex toys - externally, vaginally, and anally. Not all water-based lubes are alike, though. Unlike most pharmacies, supermarkets, and a lot of adult stores, all of the lubes you'll find at Jellywink are free of glycerin*, parabens, propylene glycol, and other harsh or generally crappy ingredients that we don't think should go into the most absorbent parts of your body. Our customers especially like Wicked Simply Aqua and Sliquid H2O - as well as feeling great, they are pH balanced and vegan.
*Glycerin can trap bacteria and increase chances of yeast or bacterial infection in some vaginas. Others don’t have any problems with it. The general advice is to avoid lubes with glycerin.
While they’re a safe option for all of the sex things, because water-based lubes are primarily made of, well, water, they tend to dry up faster than other lubes and may need to be reapplied if you’re at it for a while.
Pro tip: after you’ve reapplied once, rather than adding more lube, just add a bit of water – this will rehydrate the ingredients that are still on you, rather than using up all your precious lube and making for an even stickier situation.
Silicone
Silicone provides the best, longest-lasting glide. This makes it particularly good for anal sex, penis masturbation, and vaginal dryness, since it’s very slick and doesn’t need to be reapplied often. Silicone is also hypoallergenic so it’s less likely to cause irritation or infection in the event of micro-tears during sex. It’s also safe to use with any type of barrier (condoms, dental dams, gloves), but it should not be used on silicone toys, as it will damage their texture.
Silicone is also waterproof so it’s great for shower sex. Just be careful not to slip!
I recommend Swiss Navy and Wicked Ultra for anal sex, and Überlube for an all-around great silicone lube that doesn’t feel greasy.
Pro tip: if you want to use silicone lube with a silicone toy, put a condom on it! For smaller toys, try a smaller size condom for a better fit, like Iron Grip or Glyde Slimfit.
Hybrid
The best of both worlds. Hybrid lubricants are mostly water-based with a little silicone blended in. They offer a better, longer-lasting glide than regular water-based lube, but wash off easily, and are safe to use on silicone toys*. My staff and customers really like Sliquid Silk and Wicked Simply Hybrid.
*I recommend you do a patch test first – put a dab on the base or back of the toy and leave for a couple of hours. Rinse, dry, and rub the spot - if the texture hasn't changed, you're good to go!
Oil-based
Most oils are not ideal for use in vaginas and anuses, because oil is hard to wash off and, therefore, can trap bacteria and cause infections down there. Coconut oil-based lubes, like Coconu, may be the exception, due to coconut oil's antibacterial, antimicrobial, and antifungal properties. I advise against using coconut oil that comes in a jar as lube - sticking fingers that have been touching body parts in a jar of oil is far from hygienic! Also keep in mind that oil can stain sheets and be harder to wash off than water-based and hybrid lubes.
Now for the really important bit: do not use oil with condoms!* Oil can cause them to break, which can expose you to an STI and/or unwanted pregnancy.
*The only exception to this are polyurethane (PU) condoms, such as Trojan Supra. If you rely on condoms for safer sex but just can’t live without oil, switch to PU condoms.
Flavored Lube
Flavored lube can be a fun addition to oral sex. It gives extra glide without solely relying on the performing partner’s saliva. Jellywink carries water-based, sugar-free flavored lubes to keep you safe while you play – sugar is food for yeast, so keep it away from your pussies and penises!
Warming Lubes and Gels
All of the above-mentioned lubes enhance sensation by providing glide between your body and your toy or partner’s body. For folks seeking a little extra oomph, we carry several lubes and gels/balms/oils that increase sensitivity in your fav erogenous zones, e.g. clit, nipples, head of penis, perineum. These lubes create tingly, cooling and/or warming sensations that stimulate blood flow, making your parts more sensitive. I love Sliquid Sizzle, a warming water-based lube, and Sliquid O Gel, a stimulating water-based gel.
What's the best lube for anal play?
The anus does not produce its own lubrication, so it's imperative to use plenty of high quality lube during anal penetration. Silicone-based lubes are ideal for anal sex because of silicone’s super slick, long-lasting glide. Silicone doesn't contain water so it doesn't dry up and need to be reapplied often, if at all. I recommend Wicked Ultra and Swiss Navy silicone lubricants.
As I mentioned before, silicone lube will damage silicone sex toys so if you're using those anally, opt for a more viscous (thicker) water-based lube like Wicked Simply Aqua Jelle or a hybrid, like Sensuva Ultra Thick Hybrid lube.
TLDR;
- Compatible with all toy materials and condoms
- Rinses off easily
- Tends to dry up and need to be reapplied during extended play
- Pro tip: spritz a little water on to rehydrate before reapplying to save lube and prevent stickiness.
- Super slick and long lasting
- Great for all types of play
- Best lube for anal sex
- Safe with all condoms
- Not compatible with silicone toys
- Hybrid lube
- Water-based + a little silicone
- Superior, longer-lasting glide than water-based
- Compatible with all condoms and silicone toys
- Avoid using most oils for internal use - it can hold on to bacteria and potentially cause an infection
- Coconut oil-based lubes may be an exception
- Safe to use with silicone toys
- Not safe to use with condoms - it can cause them to break