By Erin Voss
I love that the world of sex tech offers countless options of pleasure products that provide different types of stimulation to suit different desires, and I have a sizable collection. But choosing a new toy - especially if it’s your first - can be daunting, given the massive selection available, so I’ve put together a little guide to help folks with vulvas choose their next - or first - sex toy.
The first thing I ask folks who are looking for a sex toy is what kind of stimulation they like. If you’ve never used a sex toy, think about what kind of stimulation you enjoy when you touch yourself or when a partner touches you. Mainly clitoral (external)? Mainly vaginal (internal)? Both at the same time? Not sure?? Read on and we’ll figure it out together!
Mainly clitoral
Small vibrators, such as bullet vibes, provide targeted clitoral stimulation. My favorites are Tango X (super rumbly), Touch X (rumbly and perfect for use during penetration), and Je Joue Classic Bullet (an all-around great vibe). VeDO Bam Mini is another option at a lower price point, just note that its vibrations are slightly more buzzy (more on that later).
If you like applying pressure (e.g. you or your partner pushing down when rubbing your clit), you might like a vibe that covers more area and allows you to apply pressure, such as Dame Pom, Magic Wand Mini, or Vedo Wini.
If you already own a vibrator (or several) and want to try something different, air pulsators, aka clitoral suction toys, offer a unique sensation that many people find incredibly pleasurable. We carry several - I personally love the Womanizer Liberty 2, as it starts low and gets stronger. We-Vibe Melt is more powerful and the design allows for use during penetration, as well. And let's not forget about the Romp Rose - adorable, powerful, and can be used as a vibrator, too, by removing the top cover!
I recommend newbies choose a vibrator or air pulsator with multiple settings that starts with a low intensity, like Liberty 2, so that you can explore and find how much stimulation you like.
Note: not all vibrator motors are the same. They range from very buzzy (high frequency vibration) to very rumbly (lower frequency vibration). Some people love a buzzy vibrator, but many people find them to be overstimulating and/or kind of (temporarily!) numbing. More rumbly vibrations penetrate more deeply and many people (myself included) find them to be more satisfying. I like that the more rumbly the vibration, the longer I can use it which is great if you like to edge yourself or just like a longer self-pleasure session. In a hurry? Just turn up the intensity to expedite your O. If you know you like a buzzier vibration, Nu Sensuelle Joie, Femme Fun Ultra Bullet or Bam Mini might be up your alley. For those deep, rumbly vibe lovers, I highly recommend Tango X, Touch X, and Pillow Talk Sassy.
Mainly vaginal
For folks that primarily enjoy penetrative vaginal stimulation, we have some great options for you and your vag. Pillow Talk Sassy is curved to massage the g-region and offers wonderfully rumbly vibrations ranging from nice and gentle to mind-blowingly intense. If you like a softer, girthier toy, I recommend Lola G. It’s squishy and flexible and has a powerful motor, plus a boost button that turns the toy up to the highest setting for ten seconds to push you over the edge when you’re close to climax. VeDO Midori is a shorter option with strong vibrations and lots of patterns.
If you’re mainly interested in the penetration aspect more than vibration, we carry dildos in a variety of shapes, sizes, textures, and materials - 100% silicone, glass, and steel. (All of our dildos are made of hygienic, body-safe materials. Avoid "jelly" or soft plastic-blend toys like Ultraskyn, as they can absorb bacteria as well as break down and leech over time).
I recommend shopping for dildos in person so you can see how big they are and give them a squeeze to find one that has the density you’re looking for. If you’re not in Tucson, you can find details about size and density in the product descriptions to help you decide. You can also message us via the chat function to get help finding the right dil.
Clitoral and vaginal at the same time
Some people with vaginas love (or need) a combo of vaginal and clitoral stimulation (“dual stimulation”), to orgasm. Think of a partner fingering you while licking your clit, or rubbing your clit during intercourse. Luckily, there are toys that emulate that kind of stimulation! Dual stim toys are often referred to as rabbit vibrators, because the original had a little rabbit head that provided clitoral stimulation. A modernized version of that toy is Kinky Bunny. It has a slightly flexible, curved shaft to provide g-spot stimulation, and a cute little rabbit head to tease and please your clit. The shaft and rabbit head are controlled separately so you can adjust the intensity of each to your liking.
The creme de la creme of dual stim toys, imo, is Nova 2. The shaft is adjustable so you can get just the right amount of pressure on your g-spot, and the outer arm flexes as you thrust so it stays in constant contact with your clit. And I love the strong, rumbly vibrations.
A customer favorite (and one of mine) is the Orange County Cutie thrusting vibe. Rather than using vibration to stimulate the vagina, the curved shaft thrusts in and out, giving your g-spot a delicious massage, while the outer arm vibrates on your clit. Customers have literally thanked me after buying and using this toy.
Another option, which is my go-to, is using a dildo and a vibrator at the same time. This lets you customize your experience because both dildos and vibes come in so many different options.
Not sure!
If you haven’t had much experience with self-pleasure or partner play, you might not be sure what time of stimulation you like, and that’s ok! Something to consider is that most people with vulvas need clitoral stimulation to orgasm. So a bullet or wand vibe are likely good choices. However, I typically recommend getting a toy that you can use either externally or internally. This way you can explore both and discover what you enjoy. Vush Shine, Swan Mini Wand, and VeDO Midori are great options.
Finding your favorite sex toy can be a process of trying out different ones before you hit the jackpot, but hopefully this guide streamlines your search! Happy masturbating!